“Even when they were committed on the surface (for instance, engaged or married), you might discover that the two of them led very separate lives.” 13.
They’ll keep saying they want to "take things slow" as an excuse.
You can tell that something about relationships clearly freaks them out, but they can't articulate it.The first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem, after all.Another key phrase Brogaard says to be wary of is "Not sure I'm ready for a relationship right now. “It's difficult for commitment phobes to show signs of affection, especially in public,” says Brogaard.Give me some time." You'll make your desire for monogamy clear, and rather than breaking things off to spare any hurt feelings, they'll string you along with promises of a "maybe-one-day" relationship. “They will tend not to say ‘I love you’ back, or they will only say it after drinking or the like.” This, my friend, is a very good question and a topic for another blog.
My period of relationship ‘false starts’ taught me a lot about commitment and about my own choice in men.
They had lots of short relationships, or pretty shallow long-term ones.
“If they had long relationships, they were usually not very committed,” says Brogaard.
Some can only put it in writing but not say it (or vice versa).” 9. While “they may still be part of a big circle of people who meet up” according to Brogaard, they don’t have friends they’ve stuck with for a long time and have a deeper relationship with. They won’t actually admit fault in their past relationships.
“They might blame the other person or simply say 'we weren't a good match' or 'we were just really bad for each other,” says Brogaard.
Brogaard suggests possible questions to ask a commitment-phobe about their fears of relationships: “Is it that they impose on your need for alone time? Is it that you set unrealistically high standards for potential partners?